Worker's comp??

It's been a long week. My body hurts and I am ready for the weekend. Monday and Tuesday I stayed late at my second job because my boss has been on vacation and I had to get caught up on some projects. Then the physical labor of my morning job has really been taking a toll on me lately. Today I had sore back muscles long after I left the warehouse and it made it hard to work in the office. I've decided I'm due for a massage, getting one tomorrow. Maybe if I do more squats and make it more habitual to bend my legs and less of my back it will help. Still I have to do a lot of leaning across a just-below-waist-high platform. I don't know. Hopefully I'll figure out a solution. 

Am I the only one who self analyzes a lot?

I've just been thinking. Some of my weaknesses are that I tend to have a negative perspective more often than not and that I depend too much on others to bring me happiness. Mind you, I have more flaws than that but these two are more obstructive to me right now. So I wonder if I'm supposed to learn to be more positive and to find happiness and joy in and of myself. I think this because though I try to find significant relationships they often don't work out because of my negativity and my inability to have a good life apart from someone else being in it. It's like fate or God is purposely making it this way so I will learn to fix those weaknesses. Lol, my thoughts just now were all pretty negative about my predicament if that is truly what it is. Yes, I definitely could be more positive. 

I guess me writing this is me trying to say, "Yeah I see I have this problem and that I ought to redouble my efforts in what I think will fix it. Ok going to try and do that. Thanks for the moment of reflection and evaluation."

Sunday ride

So today was nice. I went for a ride. Went up Emigration Canyon, then through East Canyon and then back to the valley through Weber Canyon. Saw lots of other peoples out on bikes too. My arms got a little sunburnt. 

Well it's time to begin another week. But at least this one is a short one. 

I added some window stickers to my truck today. Got them on my birthday :D

Happy Birthday

So today was my birthday. And to celebrate I played mini golf with my parents. Then we went and played arcade games and I won the jackpot on one of the games by popping the balloon. Got over 600 tickets :) so I got a stuffed turtle as my prize. He's cute. I've gotten a lot of happy birthday wishes and it's been really great to receive them. I wish I could see everyone in person and spend some time with them. One day it will happen :) 

Weekend review

I'm feeling alright right now. It was a fairly busy day but it was good. 

I neglected to mention what I did last weekend. Since Wednesday is my birthday I got together with a few friends and went to Boondocks Friday night. I think we all had a lot of fun. I did anyway. It's been awhile since I've laughed so hard I couldn't breathe. Then on Saturday I went shooting with some other friends as well as having dinner and a movie with them on Sunday. I'm grateful to have these friends. 

Relationships mean a lot to me. That doesn't mean I'm good at them, but trying to maintain them is what I aim to do. I feel like I fail in this a lot, but I would keep on trying to be better. 

Heart stuff

Are there people out there who are kind and compassionate and who love others warts and all? I know things get in the way, like anger, frustration, impatience, hurt feelings, or fear, but are there people out there who will put the other first and be unconditional in their care and love towards the other? 

Tonight I'm feeling like the differences between me and someone/anyone else are too great of an obstacle to overcome. I want friendship and connection and understanding and compassion and the spirit of working together to help and forgiveness and unconditional love...everywhere. I want it at work, at home, anywhere there are people. I want the spirit of love/family/friendship to exist everywhere in everyone. I wish no ill-will on anyone and I wish I could always be a friend and kind to everyone. 

I want to find someone, many, who can see the depth of my heart and cherish it. I want to find people who can see the real me and want me in their lives. 

Job stuff

Oh boy, am I glad for this week to be over. It hasn't been a bad week persay, but it's been a rough one, specifically in the mornings, at my morning job. Today I even had 4 of my drivers helping sort boxes because so many of them were coming down the line at a time. They don't have to help. And usually I only have one helping at a time, not always the same one. I guess that's the bright side. I have good people around me at that job that counterbalance the stress that comes from it.