Trapped

Well it's Thursday.  One more day and it's the weekend.  Weekends can be tricky for me.  I usually make plans to do things with friends and when I do, I have fun.  But lately, even after I have fun, I've been having anxiety attacks, too.  That's what last Sunday was.  I posted and then had an awful night with fear and the sense that something bad would soon happen and feeling trapped.  I was thinking about that analogy the other day of feeling trapped.  I was thinking this feeling I have isn't the same as feeling trapped like stuck in some place and you're trying your hardest to get out.  This feeling is one of feeling surrounded by monsters and demons and everything that brings you pain and hurt and fear and having nowhere to escape, thus you are trapped.  See they are different.  One is more debilitating than the other.  One is scarier than the other.

Anyways, as I was saying it's almost the weekend.  Work has been slow this week and I've had to suffer through being kicked out of my office at work so some new software could be installed on my computer and then troubleshooted by someone who knows nothing of what he is doing.  Ugh.  We possibly might be starting a new process at my second job that has more steps for me to do.  Yay :(  Not looking forward to it, but on the bright side, it might give me the chance to get more hours than I'm currently getting.  Money's good, yes?